Thursday, March 16, 2006

Don't Bug Me

One of the unadvertised features of operating a lawn greeting service is the wildlife one picks up during the course of business. This can be exacerbated by a certain laxity in flamingomobile hygiene (we do wash and vacuum out the delivery vehicles, I just can't remember the last time). I am currently sharing the navigator's side of the van with a spider. I noticed the web in the upper right-hand corner of the windshield for the first time about a week ago, when I stuck my finger through it during a particularly emphatic navigational instruction.

Last night I spotted the web's occupant maneuvering around the outer reaches of her mobile home. You can be sure I spent much of the remainder of the trip with one eye on the spider. I wanted to make sure I would be ready to scream and thrash around if she made any move toward venturing down for a visit. For some reason, this screaming/thrashing behavior on my part tends to frighten the wits out of DBFA when he is driving. I doubt if it does much for the spider either. Hey, it's not as if I have anything against spiders - I just prefer a cordial distance in our relationships. And definitely don't be walking on me!

There is also the thrill of grabbing a nice cool handful of slug when retrieving critters. Being a flocker is not for the faint of heart.

I love flocking in the ritzy neighborhoods. Any palatial home with immaculate landscaping benefits from a touch of pink plastic class. And it tends to frighten the neighbors.

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